Fuck appropriateness.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
