I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
