But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
