oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
