so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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