I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
