the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
