This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
