Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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