In the future we'll all be gay
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
