***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
