1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
