it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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