I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
