it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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