Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
