Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
