I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize