He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
