If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
