They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
i need some magic done to my vagina
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
