Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize