all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
