I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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