gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
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