Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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