Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I smell stomach acid.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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