I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize
