Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize