I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
