she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
