Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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