Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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