guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Dicks are not precious.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
