Taylor Swift is so right about you.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I have feelings that need drinking.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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