she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
how do flat chested girls get laid?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Randomize
