Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(707): View more from California

I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits

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(773): View more from Illinois

If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.

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(515): View more from Iowa

In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.

(978): View more from Massachusetts

Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.

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(708): View more from Illinois

It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.

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(815): View more from Illinois

HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.

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(231): View more from Michigan

JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good

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