she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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