woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Randomize
