UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
