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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
ugly people sure do ruin things
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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