im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
