Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
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