Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
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