Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
