just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Moan for me like Helen Keller
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Randomize
