do herpes really smell.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
So vagazzling was a success
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize
