I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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