why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
