I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
You pole danced in your parka.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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