You're completely useless in the revolution.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Randomize
