Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
