I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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