for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
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